I never want to see another naked old woman again.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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