how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
