okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
