Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
