umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
