Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
