We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
