capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
