bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
