Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
