dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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