dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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