And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
whose ass print is on the piano?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
