He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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