Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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