i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
