I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
