Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
