question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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