Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize