Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
