Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
just found out that she named her cat after me.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
