Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just pynch a tree in the face
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
