Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
