feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
