I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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