And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
only you would photoshop your dick
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize