tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
