If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
