corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
