After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize