I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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