I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
