Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
