Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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