But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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