Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
