This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
