is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
