Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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