How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
