My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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