You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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