hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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