I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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