But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
The feeling are messing with the penis
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Randomize
