tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
