i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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