clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize