we have pet lesbian snakes
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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