Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
